My appointment with the Repo Endo at UCSF was surprising…but good…or at least not bad. Granted, it was a terrible time for the appointment (I’m highly emotional pre-menstrually), and I cried at regular intervals (I didn't even make it through the "how long is your cycle" question--no kidding).
I really just wanted to talk and get a second opinion, but of course I got another complete intake exam, including my favorite--transvaginal ultrasound with antral follicle count. It’s not your average ultrasound. When they’re probing around deep and looking for follicles in your ovaries, it can get a little painful. Not to mention the anticipation of watching the screen for any signs of follicles, and hearing the count—8 (that’s 4 less than my other doctor saw 6 months ago).
I was sure she would agree with my other doc's recommendation and give me her blessing to go forward with IVF. When she didn’t, I was stunned. You’d think I’d be happy to hear that I may not be as bad off as I thought. But when she said she thinks I should do two more cycles of clomid (or letrozole) with IUI before moving on to IVF my heart dropped. I was so ready to go forward, pull out the “big guns” and get some answers. I already had a week off work and have been telling everyone February is the month.
I asked a lot of questions and she was very patient with me. She showed me some concrete data and talked about research that she is involved in. She said that FSH is not predictive of pregnancy rates (for IVF cycles) in women under 38. She's also seen cases in young women who don't respond to aggressive stimulation (as in egg donors), but can produce one good egg and have a successful pregnancy.
She also wants to actually see the films from my HSG. Depending on where the adhesions are she felt like surgery might be helpful.
When I left her office I was totally confused, but over the next few days things settled out a little. There's really not much to loose with two more cycles, and there's a lot of potential gain (less cost, less stress, less risk) if it works. I know the odds are still only 8-10% per cycle, but my acupuncturist is sure we can bump the odds up a bit with acupuncture and herbs. I also think I need a little more experience with disappointment before I potentially face the BIG disappointment that a failed IVF cycle would be.
So, I'm waiting to hear about possible surgery, then gearing up for a few more IUI cycles before the big IVF.
5 comments:
I never thought about building up some sort of "tolerance level" for disappointment before. But I guess that makes since.
I don't know what all of your acronyms stood for... but it sounds like you have more options than with only the first opinion.
Whenever you get to have your baby, I know you will be a great mom. It's going to be something to see. :)
-Daisha
Jess- I am glad you got a second opinon- it is actually refreshing that your doctor is not pushing the "Big guns" just yet. I am very hopeful that more cycles of clomid will do the trick. If not then you can always go ahead with IVF. Love you so much. Hope you have a wonderful holiday season. Mo
I can imagine you felt disappointed with the doctor's advice. You have already been through a lot. But like you said it is really good news. I will be praying that this round will be the ONE! IVF is still there if it is needed in a few months. I know that a few months can seem like an eternity but it will pass more quickly than you think. We are all here reading and supporting you in the meantime. My prayer for you is God's blessing, comfort, and endurance in this time of waiting. I know you already know but when you see your baby's face one day this will all fade into the background. I am going in this week for an HSG so keep me in your prayers too please.
Jamie
Adhesions can completely close the fallopian tubes. 20% (or more) of infertility is due to adhesions. Once the adhesions are surgically removed and a barrier has been used to stop reformation, pregnancy can occur. Dr. Daniel Kruschinski in Germany has been the key to many women being able to conceive. He is the best adhesions specialist in the world. The results are are often posted at his message board (new babies!) www.adhesions.de. Best to you,
I just don't have words...I can sort of imagine how utterly overwhelming this is. I guess one step at a time, one day at a time, is all you can take in. I remember sitting in an RE's office, and being both happy we were finally getting a dx and an 'action plan' like Jon called it, but totally, undeniably sad and overwhelmed about this emotional roller coaster. It is something you NEVER are prepared for. You are in our hearts. (((HUGS))) miriam
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